Demetri Martin Appreciation Thread

[mob roulette]

all hail the new king?

"Graffiti. I don’t like graffiti, unless it teaches me something, you know? Like “Oh, that’s how Alex feels about Maria. I wouldn’t have known if I had not walked by there, thank you.” Graffiti’s the most passionate literature there is, you know? It’s always like “Bush sucks!”, “U2 Rocks!”. I want to make indifferent graffiti. “Toy Story 2 was okay!” “I like Sheryl as a friend, but I’m not sure about taking things further”, “This is a bridge!”, “That guy’s right!”

ok go.

[Hannahrain]

I was all set to turn off the computer and I decided to browse one last time. I had to log back in just to commend you on your thread.

I'll yousend some of the comedy album if you don't have it, although he's better when you can see him. Material enhancers and all that.

[thefunkylama]

I appreciate Demetri Martin.

[keriann]

“I like Sheryl as a friend, but I’m not sure about taking things further”

That's my very favorite line.

You do have good taste mob.

Hannah I was gonna ask you if you saw the thing he did for Spin.

[mob roulette]

yeah, you're right, a lot of it is in the presentation. hannah, this one's for you girl:

"I was making pancakes the other day and a fly flew into the kitchen. And that’s when I realized that a spatula is a lot like a fly-swatter. And a crushed fly is a lot like a blueberry. And a roommate is a lot like a fly eater."

word.

[Hannahrain]

Demetri Martin: Clearification

Episode 1:
NsbC1rqOcDc

Episode 2
K_oPC8O6Gnk

Episode 3
QdfR9KN82SE

Episode 4
0tEmuy1g7mY

Episode 5
8ps_Bro8TR8

The last one isn't on youtube for some reason, but it's on the clearification (www.clearification.com) site. Make sure to watch the intro for a few minutes before navigating away from the main page.



Demetri Martin doing a video for the Travis song "Selfish Jean"

G0sES3nzgsU

I did see that thing, Keriann. The "avoid Jesuses" thing was great.

[Hannahrain]

The Paradoxatour is one of the world's most controversial creatures. It is said only to exist if you believe it doesn't.

I could do this all day. I won't, but I could.

[Hannahrain]

This is a poem he wrote with the words off a Rolling Rock beer:

Women, your ability to operate
extra tender
springs from birth.
Good machinery comes
as your contents
cause enjoyment.
Cash, beer, a car ... rock and rolling?
During "it", the general warning:
"We may risk pregnancy
according to old problems."
Your refund from the government
for alcoholic beverages?
Not OK.
Refund this premium, beer surgeon,
because premium beer impairs taste.
A drink—to the tribute of health, to the pale alcoholic.
Rolling, glass tanks of beverages rock this lined mountain.
Should the defects
of consumption
drive me ...
Or you?
Latrobe, Latrobe COL, CT, DE, IA, MA, NY, VT, CA, MI
"33"


This is a palindrome he wrote:

Dammit I'm mad.
Evil is a deed as I live.
God, am I reviled? I rise, my bed on a sun, I melt.
To be not one man emanating is sad. I piss.
Alas, it is so late. Who stops to help?
Man, it is hot. I'm in it. I tell.
I am not a devil. I level "Mad Dog".
Ah, say burning is, as a deified gulp,
In my halo of a mired rum tin.
I erase many men. Oh, to be man, a sin.
Is evil in a clam? In a trap?
No. It is open. On it I was stuck.
Rats peed on hope. Elsewhere dips a web.
Be still if I fill its ebb.
Ew, a spider… eh?
We sleep. Oh no!
Deep, stark cuts saw it in one position.
Part animal, can I live? Sin is a name.
Both, one… my names are in it.
Murder? I'm a fool.
A hymn I plug, deified as a sign in ruby ash,
A Goddam level I lived at.
On mail let it in. I'm it.
Oh, sit in ample hot spots. Oh wet!
A loss it is alas (sip). I'd assign it a name.
Name not one bottle minus an ode by me:
"Sir, I deliver. I'm a dog"
Evil is a deed as I live.
Dammit I'm mad.

[mob roulette]

I liked the Zebratard.

[kingsblend420]

YES! Absolutely!!! I saw him last year and it was the best comedy show I've been to.

Next Coachella I would like to see Demetri Martin get a 45 min set instead of Comedians of Comedy who magically expanded their roster from 4 funny people to 13 people of varying degrees of comedy to make me want to leave.

Demetri Martin for president!

[Jenniehoo]

I'm pretty much in love with him lately - thanks to Keriann and Brad.

[kroqken]

I prefer Demetri from Paris. He did a live album from the Playboy Mansion once.

[york707]

Haha - I watched his special last night... is that why you decided to post this?

[kroqken]

No, pure coincidence.

[betao]

In most cases, saying "im sorry" and "I apologize" mean the same thing. Except at a funeral.

A drunk driver is very dangerous. So is a drunk backseat driver if he’s persuasive. ‘Dude make a left.’ ‘Those are trees…’ ‘Trust me.

[Down Rodeo]

I just saw part of his special last night, and it was absolutely hilarious. I need to see this guy live some day.

[J~$$$]

Im in like with this guy.

[york707]

Is Kroq Ken Mob?

[Hannahrain]

Uh, no. Ken Roulette and KroqMob are two totally different people.

[CuervoPH]

I haven't listened to him yet, but love the quotes on here. The one about the funeral particulary had me rolling.

[Hannahrain]

Here (http://www.megaupload.com/?d=GX2X028W) is some of his album that I uploaded for someone, but the rest of you are more than welcome to download it as well.

[kingsblend420]

puzFWDPy3i0

[kingsblend420]

Demetri Martin: Clearification

Episode 1:
NsbC1rqOcDc

Episode 2
K_oPC8O6Gnk

Episode 3
QdfR9KN82SE

Episode 4
0tEmuy1g7mY

Episode 5
8ps_Bro8TR8

The last one isn't on youtube for some reason, but it's on the clearification (www.clearification.com) site. Make sure to watch the intro for a few minutes before navigating away from the main page.



Demetri Martin doing a video for the Travis song "Selfish Jean"

G0sES3nzgsU

I did see that thing, Keriann. The "avoid Jesuses" thing was great.


I love you Hannah.

[Hannahrain]

I think we should just be friends, kingsblend.

[kroqken]

Who the hell is mob?

[Hannahrain]

Who the hell is mob?

Dear Mob

Please come get your new sig.

Love, Hannah.


edit: ken, mob roulette is the person who started this thread.

[Hannahrain]

How does this happen and why the fuck is it in New York:

hi.

i am doing a show tomorrow (sunday, may 27) at a place called ps 122.

it's on 9th street and 1st avenue in the east village, new york, america, the world.

the show is with musicians gillian welch and david rawlings.

it's at 8pm.

the phone number of the place is 212-477-5288.

hope life is good.

bye.

demetri.